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the following was scratched out blurry eyed in the air just before landing in the uk.

Enjoy this Tom foolery
Air Canada can lick my balls. Be aware I am swimming in my second in flight vodka tonic on British airways (it is a gentle mans drink and this being a gentle mans flight) but air Canada is an awful evil angry maggot organization. I am currently on a British airways flight heading towards my UK comedy death march. Now I rarely fly to tell jokes but when I do I fly air Canada where they never feed me they never help me and they this service fills my head me with a hackey joke premises and blood lust. No more this flight is an hour way I am typing this through a sleeping mask with a blanket while watching 2 movies. If this was on an air Canada flight I would be eating a napkin and licking my palms for moisture. Instead my steward (hopefully named Stuart). England if your planes are anything like your country this twenty days will be a treat. 

Another thing to note is that I thought I will be in the uk until the 23rd but I am dumb and I am in the uk until the 20th. So if Amy winehouse wants to talk about her issues or wants to help in my solo reenactment of trainspotting you have twenty days.

Okay there is no point to this post. I just feel like I should post because I am traveling and have less excuses not too. Enjoy reading this mom I know you are the only one who does.